What’s it Like to Marry a Thai Woman – It’s Awesome!

What’s it Like to Marry a Thai Woman – It’s Awesome!

I’m writing this for those of you who are curious about what it’s like to marry a Thai woman. Maybe you’ve heard how sweet and how beautiful Thai women are. Well, I married one, and she is amazing. Maybe you’re like me and had had a bit of bad luck with a few Western women, and maybe you know a friend who has been lucky enough to marry a Thai girl. If you ask me about what it’s like to marry a Thai woman – I totally would do it again – in a heart beat.

Several thoughts that come to mind:
1) Do Thai women make better wives?
2) Will a Thai women think I am too old for her?
3) Where do I meet a good Thai girl?
4) What about the dowry and the wedding?
5) If you marry a Thai woman, it’s like marrying her family

6) What about the visa process?

1) Do Thai Women Make Better Wives?

Every woman, regardless of their nationality, has the potential to be a wonderful wife. So the answer is no, Thai women do not make better wives. The success of your marriage depends on the girl you marry and how well you treat her. I absolutely love the Thai culture and and all of their traditions. I love that my wife is Thai and she brings her Thai traditions inside our home. The Thai people I have met in the 4 years since we started dating are all so kind and loving, and I can see why so many expats want to marry a Thai woman and retire there. My wife has a heart of gold, and she cares about me more than anyone else I have ever been with. From my experience, a Thai woman will not walk away from her relationship as quickly as some western women. I have had some great relationships with western women, and I wish them the best. But one of the many reasons why I love about my wife, is when we have an argument, she won’t stay angry for very long.  A good Thai girl will love you, warts and all, and she won’t leave you if you treat her well. 

Some of you may have heard that a Thai woman will let you be the master of the house. If you want to be a dominate male in the house, and you enjoy telling your wife what to do, then no woman is going to want to be with you for very long – Thai women included. So you can forget about looking for that kind of Thai wife. It’s a myth, and they don’t exist. My wife and I are both happy with the way we treat each other. She laughs whenever I try to act macho and she is always telling me – “Happy wife, happy life!”.

2) Will a Thai Girl Think I Am Too Old For Her?

Surprisingly – No. That doesn’t mean that a 20 year old Thai girl is going to fall for a 60 year old man. When I met my future Thai wife, she told me the perfect age difference between a man and woman is somewhere between 10 to 20 years. I asked her why she did not want to be with someone her own age. She said that younger Thai men are playboys. Lots of young men go out drinking with their friends every week and end up cheating on their wives and girlfriends. An older man is much more stable, and will hopefully not cheat on her.  

3) Where do I meet a good Thai girl?

I had never been to Thailand until I went there to meet my future wife almost 4 years ago. So how did I meet my wife? I met her on an international penpal site. I wasn’t looking for a wife at the time, I was interested on where I might travel once I got to Thailand. Our relationship started slow as penpals, but it grew from there. So where can you meet your Thai wife? I suggest taking the same route that I took. Start looking at penpal websites. Just google search “Thai penpals” and start up some pleasant conversations. And whatever you do…remember to treat your penpals with respect and kindness. If you try to act disrespectful, then the good girls will probably not want to meet you in person. My wife and I wrote each other for 6 months as penpals before we even met face to face.

If you are planning on taking a trip to Thailand without going the penpal route, you probably won’t find your potential Thai bride in a bar. Maybe try a coffee shop and strike up a conversation and ask them what they think about the town you are visiting. And if they smile at you a lot, ask them if they are single. 

4) What about the dowry and the wedding?

My wife and I had a long conversation about the dowry before we got married. Her parents made it clear that a dowry must be presented. My wife was worried that I would not understand her traditions, but she said I really have nothing to worry about. She explained it very carefully to me that we can get a loan for about 10 thousand dollars to show everyone that I have enough money to take care of her. This money is just for show, and it was given right back to us when the wedding was over. I remember during our wedding ceremony, the dowry presentation was a really big deal. There was a lot of oohs and ahhs when the money was brought out. Like I said, all of the money was given back to us, so there was really nothing to worry about. We paid back the loan the next day.

As far as the wedding is concerned, I have to say it was the best day of my life and I cherish every moment. We had a terrific ceremony and almost 300 people showed up to celebrate. We spent about 8 thousand dollars on our wedding, which goes a really, really long ways in Thailand. This paid for all of the bridesmaid’s dresses, two separate venues for the morning ceremony and the night ceremony, lots of food, drinks, musicians, professional photographers, make-up artists, and hotel rooms for a few of our guests that came in from out of town. Some Thai weddings might cost less that that, but looking back I’d say it was perfect.

5) If you marry a Thai woman, it’s like marrying her family

My wife is very close to her parents and her two brothers. She tells me I am a part of her family now. This means we send her parents money every month. We are sending around $75 to $100 every month or so, whenever we can. Thais do not get a social security check, but her parents do receive a small pension from their old jobs. Her brother also helps the parents financially as well. 

Honestly, I am glad my wife comes from such a close family. Family is hugely important to her, and since I am now a part of her family, then I am just as important to her as well. She will always be by my side. It says a lot about her. She left her country, her family, and her friends to be married to me here in the US. All I can say is – I am deeply humbled for what she gave up to be here. She loves me more than anyone else ever has. And I am more than happy to send $100 a month to help her parents. We plan on having them come visit us in a couple of years. And shortly after that we will more than likely retire there ourselves.

6) What about the Visa process?

My wife and I decided to get a fiance visa, rather than a marriage visa. They are easier to obtain, and they don’t take as long to get. The website Visajourney.com is a wealth of information. My wife and I followed this site to the letter to get her here. They even have examples of how you fill out each form. But what I find the most helpful is their vast user forums. There are lots of people going through the visa process, and they all talk to each other on this site. It’s not easy getting a visa, and it seems like it takes forever (about 6 to 9 months), but Visajourney site explains each step and how long each step takes.

It’s totally worth it!

To me, getting married to my Thai wife was the best decision I have ever made. I have always been generally a happy guy. But I before I met my wife, I was always in an unstable relationship. Now I feel like I am the luckiest guy in the world. She has opened my eyes to new cultures, she showed me her beautiful heart, and helped me fall in love again. 

 

Gary

Gary is one of the founders of RetireBook, and is the site engineer and also one of its writers. He has been working in IT for over 25 years, is a world traveler, and enjoys everything about living in the Pacific Northwest. He is full of energy, loves the outdoors, climbed several mountains, volunteers in his community, and has been saving his whole life for an early retirement that will be coming up in just a few short years.
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